Life's Limits

     Happy Monday! Today went a lot better than I expected; I think I did really well on my math test and my physics test, and I also got to spend some time with one of my best friends, who goes to a different school! I'm actually really glad that I got to talk to her today, because she is more of what some would call a "free spirit," which is why I love her so much.
      She and I are so completely opposite in that she is very spontaneous and doesn't see any of "life's limits." I, on the other had, am typically quite boring, I always do what I'm told, and I follow the structured path that has been carved out for me since I was born. The worst part about me? I never do what I want. It's pathetic. I mean, if it's a little thing, like I want to eat a cookie, then yeah, I'm going to eat the cookie (which usually turns into like eight cookies...) but if it's actually a major decision, I'll just do what the grown-ups tell me to. I honestly don't remember, in my entire life, making a decision that was not in some way influenced by my parents, a teacher, or really anyone with any authority. I follow the rules so rigidly that I'm not even living. I hate it, but it's the only way I know how to function.
     My friend helps me live a little bit on the "wild side," if you can call it that. Sometimes, she'll just randomly show up at my house and demands me to go "exploring" with her, which basically means driving so far away that we spend most of the time figuring out how to get back. Today, we went to a place that I'd never been to before, even though it was probably only twenty minutes from my house. She insisted that we go into this sketchy gas station to get a snack, and I was freaking out the whole time (yeah, I'm that sheltered).
     Toward the end of our time together this evening, she told me that we should go somewhere together over spring break, and I said, "Yeah, we should go to like a local lake or something." (thinking that even a few hours at the lake would take some convincing for my mother), and my friend was like, "No, let's go to Canada! Or Mexico!" I totally went along with it, acting all excited about this big trip of ours, the whole time thinking that there was absolutely no possible way that either of my parents would ever let me go anywhere out of a one-hour radius of my house alone with my friend. But then I got to thinking, "What if I did? What if I just packed a suitcase and went away on an adventure with my friend?" Oh how I wish I could do what I want, but I'm afraid I simply don't have the guts. I'm not even scared of getting in trouble with my parents, I think I would be too scared to act like a real adult and step out of my comfort zone for just a few hours. I'm gonna need to work on that.

Carpe Diem,
Brooke